I care(d) about you my friend
I sense(d) you did not reciprocate
Yet I went ahead anyway
My heart deeply cared
My gut instinct was reluctant to go there
Yet I did, and my selfworth suffered
My gut instinct knew you did not care
Yet I did not listen
Good days happened and so did the bad ones
Bad ones consistently, a few of the good ones
My heart deeply cared and I did not want to let go
My gut instinct consistently questioning
I did not listen
I paid a price
For consistently ignoring my gut
And exposing my self worth
Why did I?
I did not know better
No one told me
I had my own answers
I was taught to doubt myself
To look elsewhere but here
I was taught & trained to please
I was consistently told to doubt myself
To not stand up for myself, only on their terms
And I completely silenced my friend
My constant companion
Ignored all the answers you gave
My gut instinct
As a result my self worth suffered
Why did I not listen?
I didn’t know how!
I had silenced my friend
Forced her into a corner
She did not want to talk anymore
As she felt ignored
And I did, I did ignore my gut instinct
And here we are!
My self worth suffered
And I can still feel the repercussions
Now I want to recall my friend
That I completely ignored
Forced into a corner
To come back and talk to me
But I broke her trust
When I did not stand up for myself knowingly
She is reluctant
That by force of habit
I give her false hope
And force her into a corner again
And along with her, upset my friend, self worth
When she suddenly broke her silence
She said:
I am afraid to talk to you
To open up again
I am afraid to be hurt again
And this time never to come again
And i really like you
I am your gut instinct
I protect you even when you let down you guard
And you believe the mean words of those you think should care
I am your constant companion
Ignored or not
Even I have a bit of self esteem
Please do not hurt my self worth
Your self worth
For you will lose yourself again
Please listen
And care to act on time
Care to heal your self worth
For if not
It will be taken away
Stolen
To never come back again!
Is it really what you want?
Is it?
I am not sure, I said
All I know is I care about you my friend
My heart deeply cared
I ignored you my gut instinct
And I paid a price
But now I am ready to listen
To pay the right price
Seat with you and never to force you into a corner
For I gathered you are my friend
You care about me
You guard my heart
You protect me
You make me smile
My gut instinct
My dear friend
Who saves my self worth
Make me whole
And I smile
For the self doubt is gone
I am sure as I can be
My self worth intact
From deep inside
My heart is healed
My caring friend is back
Checking my boundaries
I listen and I am finally content
Contemplating
My friend
Self worth is here
And I smile
I feel safe & cared for and I care
My heart big open
My friend self worth is back
Here to remain
And I sigh, a big sigh of relief
And I trust ❤
Self worth by Mimi MCUN 29.11.2019
